Top Definition
dope, idiot, moron, wally, pillock, dunderhead, dimwit
You are such a plonker, Rodney.
af Jackson Pillock 13. januar 2003
the term plonker started out as a reference to someone who was forever drunk on cheap wine (cheap wine is nicknamed plonk) this person was usualy a homeless person, or poor person.

today the term plonker is a very light hearted insult. Its not even seen as an insult, its like calling someone a wally. Its in no way ment maliciously. you call someone a plonker when they say or do something stupid.
bob - why didnt my food cook ?
john - you never turned on the oven, you plonker.
af Emperor Bubba 1. februar 2005
Nursery word for poos, after the 'plonk' they make when they hit the water.
Oh look, you forgot to flush the toilet and it's full of plonkers!
af David from Kingsbury 18. januar 2006
Almost any penis, but not a very small one.
A foolish person.
A big wet kiss.
Almost anything that is remarkably big.

Almost certainly most derive from plonker as size, but this in turn possibly from "to plonk", to place with little or no accuracy possibly because it was big and heavy. See also plonka.
"Put your plonker away, Eric."
"Oh Bob, you're such a plonker."
"When I said she looked nice, she gave me a plonker straight on the lips."
"It was the biggest turkey we'd ever had. A real plonker."
"She plonked the meal down in front of me. 'Get stuck in,' she cried."
af R. Clayton Jr 30. november 2005
Someone whose words are not worth reading.
See also plonk.
"Sheesh, what a plonker, I just forwarded all mail from him to the bit bucket.
af Aliza250 25. august 2005
1. A person who "plonks" all the time

2. A very lazy person

3. A procrastinator
My boyfriend is such a plonker; he stays in bed all day on weekends.
af Jack_Mier 19. maj 2014
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